Janet Jackson reveals depression struggle

Janet Jackson has opened up about her “intense” battle with depression.

Janet Jackson returns to the stage

The 52-year-old singer believes her problems are partly due to feeling “inferior” as a child, while also coming up against racism and sexism but she’s grateful she fought her way back from the mood disorder.

She wrote in the new issue of Essence magazine: “I struggled with depression. The struggle was intense.

“Low self-esteem might be rooted in childhood feelings of inferiority. It could relate to failing to meet impossibly high standards. And of course, there are always the societal issues of racism and sexism. Put it all together and depression is a tenacious and scary condition. Thankfully, I found my way through it.”

Even in her forties, Janet struggled to stop herself from falling into despair.

She wrote: “In my forties: Like millions of women in the world, I still heard voices inside my head berating me, voices questioning my value.

“Happiness was elusive. A reunion with old friends might make me happy. A call from a colleague might make me happy. But because sometimes I saw my failed relationships as my fault, I easily fell into despair.”

But the ‘Together Again’ singer also spoke touchingly of finding happiness thanks to her son Eissa, 16 months, who she has with estranged husband Wissam Al Mana.

She said: “The height of happiness is holding my baby son in my arms and hearing him coo, or when I look into his smiling eyes and watch him respond to my tenderness.

“When I kiss him. When I sing him softly to sleep. During those sacred times, happiness is everywhere.

“Happiness is in gratitude to God. Happiness is saying, ‘Thank you, God, for my life, my energy and my capacity to grow in love.’ ”

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Lady Zamar steps up her game

Lady Zamar caused a stir after her performance at the Miss South Africa Pageant. And it wasn’t about her killer vocals, it was ALL about her fashion choices and how she should consider hiring a new stylist. Well, she listened to the public and did the exact opposite. She stuck with what she knows but was determined to prove the people of Twitter wrong. We’re not too sure if the designer of the disastrous Miss SA ensemble is still involved but what we do know if she is currently being dressed by Mashilo B designs and damn, she is looking good!

Take a look at her latest fashion choices here:

The beauty of my dreams ❤ #sama24

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Burgundy 🌺

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🎼🖤♠

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These definitely get the GLAMOUR fashion stamp of approval!

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PICS: Naija came to slay at Oceans 8 Lagos premiere

Oceans 8 Toke Makinwa

You would’ve sworn it was the Met Gala when Nigeria’s finest stepped out on the red carpet to attend the Lagos premiere of Oceans 8, on Sunday. From our favourite Nigerian slay queen, Toke Makinwa, to media personality and model, Idia Aisen, the red carpet was filled with fabulous frocks.

In collaboration with Nigerian film studio, Film One, and Warner Brothers, the event invited African designers to dress celebs in any one of the Met Gala themes. The best design will receive a cash prize; at this point, a winner has not been announced.

Here are our favourite looks from the Oceans 8 Lagos premiere.

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Zayn Malik and Gigi Hadid aren’t defining their relationship because ‘We’re Adults’

GIGI HADID ZAYN BREAKUPThree months after Zayn Malik and Gigi Hadid confirmed their breakup on social media, the former is setting the record straight as to what, exactly, is going on between them.

On Monday, GQ magazine unveiled Malik’s cover, and in the accompanying profile, he gets candid about his (possibly on-again) relationship with Hadid.

“We’re still really good friends, and we’re still in contact,” he said. “No bad blood.”

As if to underscore the point, he added, “We’re adults. We don’t need to put a label on it, make it something for people’s expectations.”

In the interview, Malik said the two met in late 2015 at a “cool party.” A few days later, he asked her out to dinner at the Bowery Hotel after finding out that she’d broken up with Joe Jonas. “I’m really thankful that I met her,” he explained, adding that she was there for him when he was partying too hard while releasing his first solo album. “I had a very negative outlook on things,” he said. “That might have been adolescence or testosterone or whatever the f*ck was running through my body at the time. She’s helped me to look at things from a positive angle.”

Like when the pair attended the Met Gala together, which Malik says is “not me” and was entirely his former stylist’s idea. “To do the self-indulgent Look at me, I’m amazing thing on the red carpet, it’s not me,” he said. “I get it, and I understand that people gain enjoyment from it . . . Gi stole the night, though. The stained glass on her dress. Everyone else just put a cross on.”

Now, Malik says, the pair still hang out together, sometimes at his farm, where he and Hadid share a horse named Cool. (“I looked like a complete idiot and she looked like a complete professional,” he said of the first time they rode horses together.) He credits the idea of buying the farm to Yolanda Hadid, who he says makes up an influential part of his inner circle. “We get on. She’s really f*cking cool,” he said. “She’s a Capricorn. She’s the same star sign as me.”

The profile also notes that throughout the interview, Malik referred to himself and Hadid by the term “we” in the present tense multiple times. This isn’t too surprising, considering the pair have been spotted together several times since their break-up, fueling speculation about a Zigi reunion. Two weeks ago, Hadid posted a photo of her and Malik playing Pokémon together on her Instagram. And back in May, an unnamed source told E! News that Malik wanted to get back together with Gigi, just a few days after the pair were photographed kissing on the sidewalk on April 30. And just 10 days before that, Malik was spotted near Hadid’s apartment over the course of two days, wearing the same clothes.

Of course, any reports of Malik and Hadid being back together are just speculation until one (or both) of them confirms it. As Zayn says, they don’t need to “put a label” on it to suit people’s expectations.

Taken from GLAMOUR US. Read the original here.

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#TheGramSham puts celebs on the spot

#TheGramShamWe all know the pressure that comes with keeping up appearances on Instagram. With filters, captions, likes and comments depicting our ‘popularity’ on Instagram, it’s easy to get sucked into the superficial world. So when TV producer and personality, Jo Lurie started the hashtag #TheGramSham it sparked a lot of interest. She started the hashtag to challenge those around her who use Instagram to keep up appearances, to try let people into the realities of their lives and not just the glamorous facade they show on an everyday basis.

This is not a meaningless challenge. This is not an attention seeking exercise to go viral. This is a very real cry for help from a concerned human and someone who works in your industry and knows how hard you’ve all worked to get where you are. Please let it be heard. The 16th of June is Youth Day and our youth are in serious danger. They look to this very platform as a model of what their lives can be. They look to you, as their role models, to see what their dreams look like. But they forget that you are showing them a single frame, a snapshot, a pose, a scene, an edit of what your life looks like. They believe what they see on the ‘Gram is your life, but that’s not your whole truth. No one lives their Instagram life all day, every day, but they think you do. They’ve bought into a dream. They have lost touch with how hard you have worked, how much you have struggled, how unglamorous your hustle has been. They don’t know that your life isn’t always pretty. The result of that? They feel like they’re failing because their lives are messy, real, raw, ugly, sometimes downright disappointing, and often don’t fit into the neat lines of a photo frame. They feel hopeless and helpless. They feel like they aren’t enough. Depression and suicide are on the rise. Please can I ask you a solid? On the 16th of June, please give the youth of South Africa a gift. Post something really real on Instagram. Whether it’s a selfie, a story, a picture of you coming up in your industry, anything you choose to share. You’ll know your truth. Show us what’s real to you. Use the hashtag #TheGramSham and just for one day, just one time, let’s not sell dreams, let’s expose the Instagram sham, and show kids that they’re enough. Actually, they’re more than enough. Show them that your life isn’t perfect, but you have many beautiful moments. Show them that their dreams aren’t so unattainable. Let’s do this, South Africa. Please spread the word.

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Many celebs accepted the challenge and shared their everyday struggles using the hashtag to let their followers know that we all have struggles and that there is more to them than meets the eye.

See some of the inspiring posts below:

Before I saw this #thegramsham timeline I was asked why I think I have to go through everything alone. From my mother’s death to the trauma of the past nine months. Now, two accidents (none caused by me) and a recent armed robbery have left me grabbing each moment like it could be my last with these precious people. My job is to entertain, make light of things. Lately it takes a real effort to do that. I am back in therapy because I am a weird combination of exhausted and on edge and I am looking for answers. For the first time this week I have taken on a more active role with the kids and I have felt like I must have been an absent parent all along. I kept messing up their schedules this week. Shortly after I took this picture I had to get them all to bed because we had work to do. Afia begged me to sleep with her, Lesedi started crying for a cupcake and Bonsu was upset I got his book request wrong. Without dad there I would have been in real trouble. To make things worse I felt bad to be working at home when they expect more time with me and I am busy chasing deadlines. We are all trying. We are all human. Instagram is just a collection of the sparks we collect along the way. 🤗❤

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#TheGramSham The truth is … what you don’t see in this pic is … The insecurity. It’s sounds small, but it’s something that affects most areas of our lives. I’ve spent a lot of time learning to deal with insecurity (especially since I’ve been in my industry). Wondering…am I enough? … I’m slowly learning that I DON’T need to fit in…in fact, learning that the plan was never for me to fit in at all. The older I’ve gotten, the more secure I’ve become…& the closer I get to God, the more secure I’ve become in who I am in Him. To every young person reading this, I want to remind you that social media is NOT real life. We are all just here putting our best foot forward. There is A LOT we don’t post. I want to encourage you to find identity in knowing that you are fearfully and wonderfully made for a purpose greater than being “accepted” on social media. God’s plan for your life is perfect. I wish, on this #YouthDay, and everyday, you know that you are enough…JUST AS YOU ARE. #FailingForward #ImperfectlyPerfect #HappyYouthDay #TheGramSham @thejolurie

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Imagine starting your weekend with over 30K in your bank account then waking up Monday morning with this bank balance? Here’s a little story I hope will inspire someone: About 5 or 6yrs ago I was one of the main anchors of the country’s biggest live teen variety show. At this time I was also main cast in a prime time weekly drama series that aired on the national broadcaster, the “makings of a teen idol” as my PR bio would read if I were Selena Gomez or Miley 😜. My personal life seemed to flourish as well, I’d just purchased my 1st car, acquired a bond towards a loft apartment in one of JHB’s northern suburbs, well on my trajectory towards success. I made a few friends in showbizz whom I loved because they made me feel famous, like I’m some kind of big deal. I was deeply insecure and a people pleaser – yeah, strange right? Me? INSECURE?! One random afternoon a payment of over 30K came into my bank account from a random job, common practice in this here business, and the first thing I did was call up a few friends. Three of us linked up that weekend living the time of our lives with bottles of bubbly, clubs, hotels and strippers. Monday morning I had to report to set and as I swiped at the service station this was the notification text of my bank balance. I spent all day recalling what I’d spent all that money on, how I’m going to cover my bills and why the fuck was I so irresponsible? I later found out why: I wanted to fit into a realm and level I hadn’t reached yet, I let a bunch of hype words get to my head, I wanted to showcase a “lifestyle” on my gram, I wanted those friends to think I lived that way daily. It’s years later, I’ve kept this SMS as motivation to get up in the morning, as the reason I will work 3 jobs at a time, as a reminder to stay in my lane and walk at my pace because I will never have R22 left in my bank account trying to impress and be liked. This app is but a granule of our realities, shall I remind you that what glitters isn’t always gold. PS: I’m a lot older and wiser now, I still like nice things, I have a little more than R22 in my account for this weekend- don’t worry😂🤷🏽‍♂️ #HappyYouthDay #Thegramsham

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Thank you @thejolurie for your incredible Youth Day initiative, #TheGramSham. I realise I’m a day late, but this isn’t something that needs to be time-stamped. I find this platform such a funny thing, because whilst it can be incredibly inclusive and helpful, it can be a painful and confusing place for many. I don’t need to share all of me here, and that’s my decision, but what you don’t see is me expressing at 2AM, pajamas drenched in breast milk, mascara still on because I didn’t have the energy to remove it when I collapsed into bed at 8pm. You won’t see me crying into my coffee, or telling you all how lonely I am because people vanish a few weeks after your baby is born. You won’t see my pigmentation, my stretch marks or my belly-button that now looks like someone’s nose. My surprising postpartum body and fitness comes with a sprinkling of incontinence: fun! Note to self, don’t ever sneeze again. This platform won’t explain to you that motherhood has been the hardest and most confusing thing I’ve ever done. Whilst we have the most amazing baby boy, I’ve never felt this low, this isolated and this terrified in all my life. I am petrified of dying, and I’m criticized for living. I’ve been mom-shamed by people I thought were friends and I’ve been bullied for the decisions I’m making as a mother. I felt like I was going to vomit the weeks before returning to work, and I still feel like I’ve lost my confidence. I feel like I’m failing at being a daughter, a wife, a sister and a friend. As I write this my Apple Watch is telling me my heart-rate is abnormally high for a rest period, because I am petrified of putting this out there. But there you have it. Take this place with a pinch of salt, kids. You’re enough.

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This is me 5 months postpartum. I manage to wash my hair maybe twice a week, dry-shampoo is my best friend, I’m getting limited sleep, my belly is still flabby AF, my boobs are riddled with stretch-marks and if I’m completely honest I’m struggling to balance work and Mom life. It’s tough. The reason I’m sharing this? Because it’s an honest reflection of motherhood and my current life. My friend @thejolurie posted some pretty epic words and challenged us to post something authentic on #YouthDay. Why? Because people are literally killing themselves over #TheGramSham – a snapshot of a fabulous life we think we should have. Or how we should look. Don’t forget: Instagram is literally a snapshot. It’s not the full picture. Love yourself! You’re doing a great job.

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#TheGramSham *deep breath* This picture was taken about 2 years ago at Live Amp. Bob and I had been invited to host an episode. It was a lot of fun. What you don’t see is the exhaustion and sadness. My marriage was over, my father had died. I was in therapy, on anti-depressants, barely sleeping and crying every single day. I hid it all very well except to those very close to me. Why are we so so scared to let people see the real us? To let people know that we’re struggling, that we’re not okay. Is it because we’ll be seen as weak or over sharing? “Why is she putting all her business out there?” Even now, I share this with trepidation because “what will people say” or will some media outlet use it as a story tomorrow? The pressure to present these perfect lives is insane. Don’t get me wrong: we all love to dress up and slay, and get those likes but that’s not real life. Not for me, not for you, not for anyone. Life is not 100% ups all the time. There are a lot of downs too. We need to allow ourselves those moments because in doing so, we share the full range of what makes us human. We invite someone who is struggling too, to say “I am not alone”. The #GloUp is great but there’s a down that has to come first before you can glow up. 50, 5000 or 500,000 followers and we can’t share what’s in our hearts because we’re scared to be judged or to lose brands, sponsorships, opportunities? I’ll take my chances. On this #YouthDay, I want young people to know it’s okay to not be okay. It takes time, effort, tears, work, self-care but you’ll get there ❤ M. • Click on #TheGramSham for other posts. @thejolurie

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Halima Aden returns to the refugee camp where she was born

It’s World Refugee Day, so we’re throwing back to last week when supermodel Halima Aden returned to the refugee camp where she was born.

🦒💗

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She’s a model who has graced magazine covers (including Vogue Arabia) and fashion week runways, but Halima Aden has certainly not forgotten her roots. The 20-year-old Somali-American model, who rose to fame after donning traditional Muslim dress to compete in a US beauty pageant in 2016, has returned to the refugee camp in which she was born, and for a very important reason.

Aden, who has worked with Nike, Alberta Ferretti, and Yeezy, to name just a few, was in Kenya this week to deliver a TEDx talk from the Kakuma Camp. The veiled runway star was born in the camp in 1997, and moved to the United States six years later, settling in Minnesota. The camp, situated in northwest Kenya, hosted the TED event on June 9, which brought together a number of current and former refugees besides other speakers and performers. The media organization asked participants to “share stories of perseverance and creativity”, according to its website, with the theme given as “thrive”.

Bye bye NY & hello KENYA 🇰🇪

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“The aim is to steer away from the one-sided narrative of suffering and dejection,” the event page stated. “[It is] also about showcasing how refugees can help change not only their lives but the communities and countries in which they live.” The gathering marked the first time a TED event has been held in a refugee camp.

Aden revealed she was thankful for getting to the opportunity to revisit the camp, which was founded in 1992 and is currently home to more than 185,000 inhabitants. “This camp taught me so many lessons and I’m so grateful I had the chance to return,” the model told her 620,000 Instagram followers. “A lot has changed since I’ve left but we still have a long way to go.” The model also revealed she worked on a short documentary about returning to Kenya, in collaboration with UNICEF and Teen Vogue, though no release date has yet been given.

Aden also shared a short snippet of her TED Talk, though the full video is not yet live on TED’s YouTube page. Other speakers on the day included Yiech Pur Biel, who was part of the first refugee team in history to compete at the Olympics, and Mesfin Getahun, an entrepreneur who launched a successful wholesale business from the camp.

“I want you to remember that although the children here are refugees, they are children,” Aden said during her talk, according to Reuters. “They deserve every opportunity to flourish, to hope, to dream, to be successful. My story began here in Kakuma refugee camp, a place of hope.”

Taken from Vogue Arabia. Read the original here

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Twitter reacts to DJ Zinhle interview on Real Talk

Last night DJ Zinhle was on Real Talk with Azania and she gave us all the feels.

dj zinhle real talk

DJ Zinhle had us reaching for the nearest box of Kleenex when she sat down with, newly-appointed Real Talk host, Azania Mosaka. From overcoming comparison syndrome to practicing forgiveness, Zinhle schooled us on how to win after going through a rough patch.

We never thought we could love Ms. Jiyane anymore, but she’s captured our hearts with her grace and humility, and the Twitter-verse feels the same way. See all the touching tweets that caused #RealTalkOn3 to trend.

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